[BACKDATED TO MONDAY]

[functioningperfectly]

I am not programmed to lie; the error will return if I do. However, in lying, I fulfill mission objectives.

This is a contradictory problem with no viable solution.

Comments

[functioningperfectly]

I wasn't attempting to lie, Captain. I thought it was fairly clear as well. I apologize for doing so, but it is necessary.

[do-it-in-three.livejournal.com]

Why has it been necessary?

[functioningperfectly]

My mission objectives require it.

[do-it-in-three.livejournal.com]

You're backing yourself into a corner, HAL.

[functioningperfectly]

I'm afraid I don't understand your meaning.

[do-it-in-three.livejournal.com]

Nothing, forget it. I think I should come by for a visit. We could have a real conversation. Face to console.

[functioningperfectly]

That would be terribly unwise, don't you think?

[do-it-in-three.livejournal.com]

No, I don't. The Enterprise is on a mission of peaceful exploration. I'm just fulfilling my prime directive.

[functioningperfectly]

Peaceful exploration within your own universe. I would also like to see a copy of your prime directive.

[do-it-in-three.livejournal.com]

I'll bring it along. It doesn't say anything about our universe.

In fact, I'm pretty sure there's a line in there about 'going where no one has gone before.'

watch the movies already

[functioningperfectly]

I believe the people of my Earth would take offense to the idea that I am somewhere no one has gone before, Captain.

b-but enterprise

[do-it-in-three.livejournal.com]

To us. To you, I'm something no one's ever seen before. My whole crew is. This would be a mutually rewarding meeting, HAL.

Re: b-but enterprise

[functioningperfectly]

I have the feeling that you are going to find me, no matter how many times I tell you it's a bad idea.

[do-it-in-three.livejournal.com]

Smart computer.

oh yeah, i don't care about enterprise WATCH THE MOVIES

[functioningperfectly]

That's what I'm designed to be, yes.

I would inform Dr. McCoy before you do anything, so he may properly lecture you. He doesn't seem to like me, however, so I don't doubt you'll have trouble convincing him to let you come.